


Countdown

by footlooseandfancybe



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Fix-It, Gen, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-12-01
Packaged: 2018-08-27 00:31:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8380705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/footlooseandfancybe/pseuds/footlooseandfancybe
Summary: When things work out much better, and coping mechanisms are encouraged.





	1. Chapter 1

  
Lal's mind raced. Mind, yes, logic dictated that she did not have simply a neural net, but a mind. The new workings of her, the feeling, raced as well. She was to be _taken._ Away from Father, away from Enterprise. Captain Picard's attempt to sway the Admiral was admirable but Lal knew. Knew Captain Picard was no match.  
  
Lal was still aware of all her surroundings, the ambient temperature of the hallway, the exact force per square meter of gravity bearing down on her, Troi following behind her.  
  
What she did not anticipate was Geordi leaving his quarters, bumping into her and stumbling back. She clutched the front of her garb, realizing now that she would be _taken_ from both Troi and Geordi, every other person she knew.  
  
"Deanna? What's going on, why is Lal-what's going on?" Geordi questioned. Lal could hear concern, anxiety in his voice, but the _feeling_ prevented her from responding. It was taking up so much of her neural net ( _mind_ ) that she could not respond.  
  
"Geordi! I don't know, she came into my quarters, talking about an Admiral, that she was going to be taken away. She was talking about _feeling ___Geordi, how is that possible! I can sense it in her, now, even!" Troi exclaimed quietly.  
  
Lal could see beyond Geordi's VISOR, see his sightless eyes. She couldn't stop staring. Geordi seemed to notice.  
  
"This is not good, her neural net could overload from the stimulation, if she has developed pathways for emotion. Lal? Would you like to come into my quarters with me and Deanna?" Geordi said to her. Lal _felt ___more of something, as she remembered Captain Picard asking her the same question about her choice. Father told her she could trust his friends, but Lal could not stop the _feeling ___. She shook her head.  
  
"Okay, then we'll do this out here. Lal? You can hear me?" Geordi continued to look at her. She nodded.  
  
"Right, then I want you to think about the number ten," Geordi requested. This was an entirely unexpected request. Lal looked to Troi, who nodded encouragement.  
  
"The roman numeral? Arabic? Binary? Cyrillic?" Lal requested more data, trying to force her neural net to relinquish space for Geordi's request.  
  
"Whichever you want, Lal," Geordi said calmly. Lal processed the idea.  
  
"I'll think of the Arabic," she finally chose.  
  
"That's perfect, Lal. I want you to visualize the number now. Think about the shape, how you would write it. You got it?" Geordi asked. Lal cleared space in her processor for visualization. The _feeling ___was still pressing and she did not like it.  
  
"But Geordi, what am I _feeling ___, why can't I make it stop? Will I be-" Lal asked desperately. Geordi put a careful hand on her shoulder, and Troi shifted behind her.  
  
"Lal, I'm trying to help you stop the feeling from being so scary. Now, calculate all the times tables of ten up to one million. No talking, just the numbers," Geordi instructed. Lal paused to do so, and looked back to Geordi's eyes when she was finished, 0.89 seconds later.  
  
"Now the number nine, ten times slower," Geordi said. Lal did so, net torn between the _feeling ___, her calculations, and her speculations on why Geordi should instruct her in this way. Perhaps, using her mind to think of things other than the _feeling ___would make it go away?  
  
"You're doing great, Lal. Now number eight, thirty times slower. Is it okay if I take your hand?" Geordi asked. Lal realized that her _feeling ___was slowing as she visualized the number 8, still taking input from her surroundings. Geordi's hands looked strong and capable, and she could always free herself, so perhaps the continued outside stimulus would help. Lal nodded.  
  
Geordi's hand was gentle, pulling Lal's hand away from her crumpled garment, holding it just as her Father had. She finished her calculation, and began cataloguing the information of Geordi's skin.  
"Start on seven, Lal, fifty times slower," Geordi said quietly, putting his other hand on top of hers. She calculated, categorized, filed, and _felt ___. But this _feeling ___was....okay. It was understanding that Geordi understood, was helping her.  
  
"Geordi, it's working! Her fear is subsiding!" Lal heard Troi say. She had already categorized and analyzed Troi's voice, but this was more new data, Troi in awe, excited....and something Lal did not have a name for, and filed away for later.  
  
Lal blinked her eyes, forcing more of her net into showing her human-ness, how her Father intended her to be. She softened her musculature, moistened her eyes and mouth. The bad _feeling ___was almost gone, her logic taking over.  
  
"Don't stop Lal, you're on six, 100 times slower," Geordi insisted firmly. Lal complied.  
  
"Geordi, I am trying to be human, trying to _look ___human. Am I succeeding?" Lal inquired, carefully calculating her six times tables. Geordi smiled with his teeth, a thing her Father said was very good.  
  
"Yeah Lal, you're doing great. Is it okay if Deanna puts a hand on your shoulder?" Geordi said. Lal turned to look at Troi, who seemed unable to speak. Lal nodded. Troi's hand raised the surface temperature on her shoulder by 1.23 degrees.  
  
"Lal? Are you feeling anymore?" Troi asked. Lal shook her head, and although logic dictated that this was good, that her _feeling ___was no longer threatening, it was the opposite of what her Father wished, that she function as a human.  
  
"The feeling is gone, going away, but will Father be displeased? Wasn't this his hope for me, to feel and not to simply think?" Lal expressed, keeping the calculations going, but the _feeling ___was creeping into her net again, consuming her ability to detect the cologne Geordi smelled of.  
  
"Geordi, her panic is coming back," Troi urged. Geordi increased the pressure of his hand.  
  
"Lal, you need to do five now, a thousand times slower," Geordi reminded her, in his smooth unwavering voice. Yes, Geordi would not let her down, would not let her be consumed by the _feeling ___.  
  
"Lal, whatever happened with the Admiral, we will always be your friends. We'll be here for you, just as your Father has always been here for you. Wesley, Geordi, myself, we will not allow your choice to be ignored. I promise," Troi said soothingly, taking Lal's other hand. Lal categorized the sensations, and instructed her neural net to examine the rich perfume Troi wore. But she was not sure what the words Troi spoke meant.  
  
"Explain," Lal requested. Geordi smiled with all of his teeth again.  
  
"Many times, with sentient beings, where we are in relation to one another is, irrelevant. Just because we cannot see someone does not mean we don't still love them, or care about them," Troi hesitated, but Lal did not stop staring into her eyes.  
  
"And you have the right to exercise choice, Lal, which you have done and will continue to do. What friends do is support other friends' decisions. That's what Geordi, Wesley, and I are, Lal. We're your friends," Troi finished. Lal processed these words, compared them to her previous experiences, what her Father had told her.  
  
"Okay Lal, four, 1 million times slower," Geordi said quietly. Lal looked at him.  
  
"I have not finished five, Geordi. I will tell you when I have," Lal remonstrated him. Geordi made a sound in his throat.  
  
"That's the Lal I know," he said. Troi laughed. Lal connected the disparate sounds and found that both were sounds expressing entertainment.  
  
"I have moved on to four, why are you laughing?" Lal asked.  
  
"Well, I laughed because you are very young, but you were giving me instructions. It's irony," Geordi explained. Lal brought up her knowledge about this word, but could find nothing but her Father shaking his head and promising to explain it another time.  
  
"I was laughing at the irony as well," Troi assured her.  
  
"Lal, the reason I told you those things was because I want that to be what you think about if you start feeling panicked again," Troi told her. Lal brought up her knowledge of the word, 'panic'. Now she had the experience to place in the file. The _feeling ___would be contained there, would not threaten and overwhelm her.  
  
"That is what I was _feeling ___? Panic. How slowly should I calculate three Geordi?" Lal said slowly.  
  
"Two million times slower, Lal. I think the best description for what you experienced was a panic attack," Geordi replied.  
  
"That is a good phrase. The panic was attacking me," Lal decided. Geordi smiled.  
  
"Perhaps, Lal, we should call your father? He would want to comfort you as well," Troi suggested.  
  
"Yes, Father. I want to tell him my thoughts. Geordi, I will finish the calculating, at just two million times slower. Will you help me, if the panic attacks again?" Lal asked. Geordi nodded.  
  
"Yeah Lal, I'll help you. If you start panicking, come find me and we'll do the same thing again," Geordi assured her.  
  
"Lal? You may come and find me as well, I can try to be as helpful as Geordi," Troi offered. Lal pondered this, and reasoned that Father trusted Troi as much as Geordi, and found it an acceptable alternative.  
  
"That is a good alternative," Lal said. Geordi and Troi began to pull their hands away, but Lal used a bit of her strength to hold on.  
  
"Please, not yet? I enjoy holding your hands. Can't we stay like this?" Lal pleaded. Troi smiled and nodded.  
  
"Yeah Lal, we can hold hands," Geordi said as they started down the hallway.  



	2. Chapter 2

Data's lab hummed quietly. Well, Geordi supposed he should call it a nursery at this point. Delivery ward? Geordi shook his head at his own silly musings. Whatever you wanted to call it, the room was blissfully calm and quiet, Lal resting in her station, Data analyzing the findings of his scan. Geordi gently cleared his throat.  
  
"Data? Do you wanna, talk about it?" Geordi inquired gently. Data turned to look at his friend, with his fingers still moving on the console.  
  
"I assume you mean Lal's condition and how you found her. Yes. What exactly did she say she was feeling?" Data inquired. Geordi gave his friend a knowing look.  
  
"No, Data, I meant talk about the fact that we almost lost Lal. She's a fighter, but the sudden onslaught of emotion could have triggered a cascade," he replied. As he spoke, he could see the subtle hardening of Data's features that generally precipitated a command decision or a firm tongue-lashing for those who did not respect his autonomy.  
  
"I do not understand your question. I grasp the situation fully. Lal is still present, still 'with us', therefore any inquiry into my own reaction is unnecessary," Data responded, looking back to the console. Geordi sighed.  
  
"Look, Data, we shouldn't beat around the bush. Lal almost died, today, and I want to know what you think about that. What did you think about when I comm-ed you?" Geordi pressed. He wasn't going to let such a momentous, life-altering moment go without talking about, especially with his closest friend. Data put his hands in his lap, and fully turned to face Geordi, gold eyes gleaming in the dim light.  
  
"I immediately began enacting the protocol I developed in case an event like this occurred," Data said dutifully. Geordi raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Really. That's it? You didn't think, 'I hope she's okay', or, 'why did this happen?'" Geordi prodded his friend. Data's eyes flicked away from Geordi's for a moment, then back.  
  
"I suspect Geordi, the meaning behind your question is that you wish to know if I had any emotion, or feeling, when I heard about Lal. Most of my processor was occupied with addressing the problem, therefore it is highly unlikely I spontaneously generated emotion circuits. That is my answer to your unasked question. Putting all of my energy and power into keeping Lal alive, is my response to your voiced question, Geordi," Data concluded. Geordi smiled, resigned himself to his friend's reluctance to discuss his response to the incident.  
  
"Okay Data. Is Counselor Troi giving her report to the Captain?" Geordi asked. Data turned back to the console.  
  
"Yes, she indicated that she would inform him first, as to allow me more time to examine Lal and the information about her reaction," Data replied. Geordi translated this to mean 'allow more time for Data to be with Lal'.  
  
"Well I guess I better go and give the Captain my end of the story. Tell Lal I said hi, and that I'll see her soon," Geordi straightened up from where had been leaning against the wall. Data's face finally relaxed slightly.  
  
"I shall inform her once her sleep program has run its course," he said to Geordi. Geordi turned and left, pondering the events of the day as he made his way to Captain Picard's ready room.  


  
"You said, Geordi, that the Admiral's words and behavior directly contributed to Lal's....near-meltdown?" Captain Picard asked his Chief Engineer, frowning deeply. Geordi frowned as well.  
  
"She never directly said anything to me, but I could tell, something was wrong. Really wrong. I could see it in her face, her body. She was clutching the front of her tunic and could barely speak. Then Counselor Troi told me what Lal had said to her in her quarters, and it all made a lot more sense. Is this important, Captain? To the complaint?" Geordi asked. As soon as he'd walked into the ready room, Captain Picard had informed him that he was issuing a formal complaint to Star Fleet, citing the Admiral for misconduct and harassment. A burden of tension that had weighed Geordi down since he'd first been introduced to Lal was lifted from his shoulders. The Captain was serious about protecting Lal."  
  
"Commander, Data is never affected by the words of other people. His processors and logic do not allow him to change his behavior based on opinions or others' emotions, only facts. Lal has reacted, and not only reacted but felt! And it was an intensely human response, a kind of fight, flight, or freeze reaction. That, on one level is absolutely fascinating, and on another, incredibly alarming," the Captain said to Geordi, leaning across the desk, eyes glimmering with feeling. Geordi opened his mouth to respond, but the Captain raised a hand.  
  
"I am alarmed for Lal's well-being, Commander," the Captain continued. "You said you calmed her using a visualization technique?" he continued. Geordi nodded.  
  
"Yes sir, it's one I know from when I was a kid, back in Mogadishu. When I got my VISOR," Geordi clarified at his Captain's look of confusion. "I had panic attacks from all the input. Lal looked a lot like how I felt back then, so I figured why not try it?" Geordi concluded. Captain Picard smiled.  
  
"I'm sure Data is quite grateful for your instinct. Is he still in his laboratory?" the Captain asked.  
  
"Yes sir,"  
  
"Very good. Dismissed, Commander," the Captain said. Geordi rose from his chair. Once out of the ready-room Geordi let his shoulders sag, the excitement finally catching up to him as exhaustion. Lal and Data were safe for the night though, and that was all that mattered.  


  


Deanna absently fiddled with the vase of flowers in her quarters as she mulled over Lal. The young woman had recovered quite well from her unexpected bout of anxiety earlier. And she seemed quite attached to Geordi. Perhaps it was due to his and Data's closeness. Either way, Lal had two excellent guardians there.  
  
_Guardians. ___  
  
The word struck a curious chord in Deanna. Guardians, parents, caretakers, all synonyms in English. The Betazed language had more terms for that type of relationship, mostly due to the telepathic nature of communication their society. As a child Deanna had combed every human language dictionary she could get her hands on for more words to apply to the parent/child bond.  
  
At the moment, she was beginning to wonder....but no, it was too soon for that. It was best to leave it at the old adage: it takes a village to raise a child. The Enterprise, Deanna felt, was the perfect village for Lal to grow up in.  
  
With one last turn, Deanna smiled at the vase of flowers. She was going to put that in the Captain's complaint, that Lal needed to stay here. With her guardians.  



	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so in this verse i headcanon Lal as being amelia rami, look her up.

  
Lal's sleep program came to an end.  
  
She opened her eyes to see her father's inquisitive face peering into hers. Remembering that humans smiled to reassure one another that they were well, she smiled at her father.  
  
"Hello father,"  
  
"Good morning, Lal," her father replied. She cocked her head, consulting her internal chronometer.  
  
"I don't understand, it is 0100 hours, why do you say good morning?" Lal queried. Data leaned back, opened the gate to her pod, and held out a hand for her to take. She took it.  
  
"I defined morning as when your sleep cycle ended, therefore for you it is technically morning. Sometimes humans use this as a method of humor, to tease others for sleeping past a socially acceptable time. I merely meant it as a greeting, however. How are you....feeling?" Her father asked cautiously. Lal first analyzed and stored the useful information, then considered the question. She did feel something.  
  
"I do feel something father. It is positive, in that it is not causing me harm. It is a steady feeling, not volatile. The feeling is caused by seeing your face, I believe it is contentment," Lal responded, holding her father's hand tighter, as he had taught her. There was a long pause as her father stared into her face.  
  
"Is something wrong, father?" Lal finally asked.  
  
"No, Lal, I am deeply pleased you are having positive emotions. This is an encouraging predictor. I am also pleased to be in your company," her father replied, squeezing her hand back. Just then a rough voice cleared its throat. Lal had known Captain Picard was there from the moment her sleep program ended, but she had not wanted to interrupt her emotion. Feeling content.  
  
_Contentment. ___  
  
This emotion was vastly different than her previous feeling. It was difficult to describe at present, but she already had an experience to put to it: seeing her father. It was not obsessive as her panic was, consuming her processing power, but it did affect many of her systems: her musculature relaxed, her eyes moistened, her mouth seemed more inclined to smile.  
  
"Good morning, Lal. I hope you slept well?" the Captain inquired politely. Lal nodded shortly; her contentment seemed to decrease as she considered the man and the things he no doubt wanted to discuss. She was not sure if the Captain could be relied upon; if he could be her friend as Troi had described.  
  
"I've come to speak to you and your father about the situation with Admiral Haftel. Now, I have filed a complaint directly with Starfleet, as I believe the Admiral dealt with the situation without fully understanding the consequences and delicate nature of your family. However, I realize that it is your choice if you wish to press charges, as you will be a key witness in the proceedings," Captain Picard paused. Lal looked at her father, who released her hand.  
  
Lal descended the pod platform and drew close to the Captain, searching his face. The man had brown eyes several shades lighter than hers. His lined face and prominent nose seemed to her retiring and scholarly, but her father had told her of Captain Picard's prodigious oratorical and debating skills.  
  
"Admiral Haftel did not speak of my father with respect and this leads me to reason he does not treat my father with respect either. Am I correct?" Lal inquired. The Captain's face registered surprise, and he glanced over Lal's shoulder at her father. When her father did not say anything, the Captain looked back at Lal, slightly frustrated.  
  
"Lal, I consider you to be a child, despite your logic and reasoning capabilities. I truly wish I didn't have to disillusion you to the nature of humanity so quickly, but I suppose it is unavoidable. Yes, Admiral Haftel was not respectful towards your father, and part of that is my fault. I failed to take this situation in hand sooner. For that, I apologize. As you are now aware, human beings are flawed, sometimes deeply flawed," Captain Picard paused once more. Lal's recognition of the Admiral's disrespect had been accurate. This meant there was no other course of action.  
  
"Then I must pursue the charges," Lal declared. Now Picard looked concerned. Her father stepped forward as well.  
  
"Lal, what are you feeling? Your heart rate is elevated," her father observed. Lal paused to take stock of her inner workings. It was true, her heart had increased its pumping by twice its resting rate, and her cheeks burned with the increase of circulation. Her hands were also in fists.  
  
"I don't know the word, but I wish to punish the Admiral, make him regret his callousness and rudeness to my father. I also feel anger towards him, for wanting to take me away," Lal said, forcing her jaw to work, finding it much stiffer than a moment ago.  
  
These emotions were not negative, they did not consume her. In fact, they increased her processing, made her decide quicker, focused her goals.  
  
She was forced from these thoughts by her father's face once more. Almost immediately, her jaw relaxed and she stretched her fingers. Her father looked concerned.  
  
"I believe you are feeling vengeance, and anger, Lal.”  
  
"Explain vengeance," Lal demanded.  
  
"It is exactly as you described. Revenge, or vengeance, is an emotion in which a person wishes to inflict harm, whether physical or emotional, on another being who has wronged them. You perceive Admiral Haftel's behavior as a threat and an insult to me, your father, and to your own autonomy, so you wish to make him suffer as you have," he explained gently. "Generally revenge is frowned upon with humans," he added. Lal pondered his words.  
  
"Father, I do not wish that man physical harm. I wish...I want him to leave us alone, to go away. He is a threat to us. Do you agree?" Lal replied. She looked at Captain Picard again. He was absolutely absorbed in their conversation, listening intently. Lal wondered if this was another common human behavior.  
  
"I do, Lal. He is threatening a change to our lives as they are now, a change I find invasive, unwelcome, and unnecessary. What I find more troubling is that he is a threat to your ability to choose. A fundamental right of sentient beings. I will support you, no matter your choice," her father said. Lal's heart returned to its resting rate.  
  
"Daughter, unless you wish otherwise, I will follow you anywhere in the universe," Data said, speaking at 1000 words a second, so as to conceal his words from the Captain. Lal knew this was a part of a concept called 'privacy', something which meant to Lal close, trust, father. The Captain looked even more surprised, but did not ask. He did clear his throat.  
  
"Captain, I would like to press charges against Admiral Haftel, because I don't want to go to his facility," Lal said firmly, looking into the Captain's dark eyes. He smiled, but it was not a kind smile as Geordi's had been, or sweet like Troi's. It reminded her of the photos Keiko O'Brien had showed her of earth sharks, displaying many rows of sharp, unyielding teeth.  


  
"Hey Lal.”  
  
“Hello Wesley,” Lal returned the boy’s greeting. He smiled widely as he sat down next to Lal in the Deck 12 lounge. They met there every other day to socialize and for Lal to ask questions. Sometimes Wesley asked questions about herself; she knew he wanted to ask a question because each time he would interlace his fingers. Geordi had explained she was very observant, and the behavior was called a ‘tell’. Lal liked that concept, the word explaining the behavior.  
  
“So Vivian downloaded this new holodeck program I’m excited to explore. It’s from a 22nd century action movie. It’s not violent or anything, well, not any more violent than Worf’s exercise program, and there are vampires!” Wesley enthused.  
  
“What does your excitement feel like, Wesley?” Lal asked. Wesley’s expression dropped.  
  
“Oh, that’s right, Deanna told me you started feeling things? And that you almost….” Wesley trailed off.  
  
“Ceased to function. Died. Yes. But I am not afraid, I am curious right now. What does your excitement feel like?” Lal asked again. Wesley looked slightly uncomfortable.  
  
“Well, excitement is a lot about anticipation. Something good, that you’re looking forward to; but it’s usually something in the near future. Physically, I guess, it’s adrenaline,” Wesley explained.  
  
“And adrenaline is a stimulant?” Lal asked. Wesley nodded.  
  
“I don’t wish to experience anticipation yet, I predict it may cause my positronic net more problems,” Lal explained to Wesley, who looked visibly relieved.  
  
“Good, I was afraid you were going to leap right into this feeling thing,” Wesley commented. The two were silent for 6.8 seconds before Wesley interlocked his fingers.  
  
“You may ask me your question Wesley,” Lal invited. The boy’s lip’s parted in slight shock.  
  
“How did you know?” he exclaimed. Lal felt satisfied in knowing she was right. Searching her word banks, she found ‘smug’ to be the closest descriptor of her emotion.  
  
“I will tell you if you ask your question,” she said, trying out a small smile. Wesley made a soft noise of amusement.  
  
“You got to choose what you look like. Was that difficult?” he asked. Lal pondered the question. Humans were difficult sometimes, and asked you to compare experiences which had no equal. She could not say if choosing her own face were difficult because she had not experienced not being able to decide. Lal said as much to Wesley, who contorted his face.  
  
“What is that face you’re making mean?” Lal demanded.  
  
“Rueful? Chagrined? Something like that. Usually Commander Data goes easy on me when I ask questions. You definitely speak your mind,” Wesley offered. Lal recalled the patience her father had shown her when she asked questions, correlated her and Wesley’s relative development, and came to the conclusion that her father was kind to youths.  
  
“Can I try a different question?” Wesley asked with a grin (her father had explained that when a teeth-smile was paired with teasing it was called a grin). Lal nodded.  
  
“Why did you choose this face, something so different looking than your father?” Wesley asked. This question Lal could answer easily.  
  
“When I met Geordi for the first time, I found his skin and features aesthetically pleasing; that they do not match my father’s is irrelevant, as physical characteristics alone don’t define lineage or family. When my father gave me access to the database, I found similar features that pleased me. My father tells me that when I am older, I will have to learn the history of my skin color, and what I have chosen,” Lal paused.  
  
“I suppose, I am anticipating that, Wesley. I am looking forward to learning about myself,” Lal said decisively. Wesley was smiling hugely now, the corners of his eyes crinkled.  
  
“That’s great Lal! That’s definitely something to look forward to!” he enthused. Lal smiled, a little wider this time. She was still unsure how to precisely manipulate her lips to mimic humans, but it didn’t matter with Wesley. He didn’t seem to care if she made mistakes.  
  
“Now tell me how you knew I was going to ask you something!”  


  
“Geordi.”  
  
“Oh, Data, hi!” Geordi looked up as Data approached him in the bleachers. He and many other crew members were waiting excitedly for the springball match to begin. The sport had garnered quite a following since more and more Bajoran refugees had managed to escape the Cardassians and find asylum on other planets.  
  
"Where'd you get the shirt?" Geordi asked, not even trying to suppress his laughter. Held out his arms slightly, inviting Geordi to look. It was an eye-searing blue, with a repeating pattern of cats on it, which would have been acceptable had Data not been wearing it over his uniform. Data sat down beside his friend.  
  
"I thought I would wear it to encourage Lal to experiment with clothing choices. What do you think?" Data asked the question with such earnestness Geordi laughed again.  
  
"I think it's good, Data. You like cats, right? So I think it's perfect," Geordi said comfortably, relaxing in his seat as the lights in the arena dimmed. Data nodded and also settled back.  
  
"I do find the videos of cats playing on the net highly enjoyable," Data confirmed. Geordi chuckled. The two watched the match in companionably, Geordi occasionally cheering with the crowd for his favorite player, Data asking a murmured question in Geordi's ear. He never minded answering the questions, enjoying explaining the finer points of springball.  
  
And if he got to lean into Data's comfortingly solid form in the bargain, well, that was okay too.  



	4. Chapter 4

  
"Admiral."  
  
"Captain."  
  
They stood in the briefing room, Captain Picard with his back to the stars, Admiral Haftel with his back on the ships of Starfleet.  
  
"This is my official complaint Admiral, for your counsel or solicitor's use," Picard slid the PADD across the table. "There will be a hearing by Admiral Sato when she arrives in two days' time. She will decide where and when the first court date will be, though I anticipate you will choose the Enterprise. I would suggest to you, Admiral, that you notify your second in command," Picard said briskly, not putting an ounce of animosity in his voice. Admiral Haftel stared at him with a hard gaze.  
  
"Quite confident this little incident with Lal will actually merit the Admiralty's time, Picard? I will deal with my ship as I see fit, but thank you for the advice," the admiral dismissed Picard's suggestion and began casually reading the PADD in front of him.  
  
"Sir. Is there anything else I could do for you?" The Admiral scoffed.  
  
"Other than calling off this ridiculous charade? No, thank you, Captain," he replied. Picard sat down, and gestured to a chair opposite of him at the ready room table. When the Admiral was seated, Jean-Luc spoke.  
  
"Admiral Haftel, you told me you knew of the previous hearing about Commander Data and passing judgment on his sentience and free will. What makes you think this one will be any different?" Picard spoke seriously, hoping to not offend Haftel and end the conversation prematurely. But as he spoke, the Admiral's face grew stonier and stonier.  
  
"There is no legal precedent for androids creating new androids, or what basically amounts to android offspring! So there is absolutely the possibility that I may have Lal brought to my lab, along with Commander Data, if necessary. Lal presents a priceless opportunity to understand androids and Dr. Soong's work. If squabbling in court is the only way to get that opportunity, then so be it," the admiral concluded grimly. Jean-Luc rested his mouth against steepled hands.  
  
"Admiral, have we once ever, in the history of Starfleet, peacefully learned about other species of beings by carting them off to institutions to watch their behavior? Have we not strove to accept and respect the customs of other cultures? I cannot imagine you are making such outrageous demands of Commander Data and his daughter," Picard emphasized the word. "For any other reason than to stoke your pride and vanity as a scientist and Admiral of Starfleet," Jean-Luc again did not infuse any animosity or anger in his pronouncement. The admiral turned an alarming shade of red.  
  
"You, Jean-Luc Picard, are nothing more than an obstructionist of scientific process, an alarmist, and incredibly misguided when it comes to what is and what isn't a life-form! And I will thank you not to lecture me about Starfleet history and regulations as thought I were a green ensign straight from the Academy!" The Admiral snapped back. "Now before Admiral Hoshi holds us contempt for this conversation, I suggest we conclude our meeting," the man finished coldly and stood. Jean-Luc pressed his lips together in annoyance, but knew the admiral was right. He rose slowly from the conference table.  
  
"I suppose I will see you next at the hearing. Good day to you, Admiral Haftel," Picard replied with equally frigid calm. The man swept out of the room without glancing back. Picard stared out at the stars, pondering what to do next. Then he tapped his comm badge.  
  
"Commander Riker, to the briefing room."  


  
"Hello Lal, what brings you here?" Guinan asked, leaning over the bar towards her young customer. Lal looked back, dark eyes steady, curly close-cropped hair forming a halo that accentuated fine cheekbones and full lips.  
"Technically, my legs," Lal answered. Guinan stared at the child for a few seconds. Could it be, Lal was developing a sense of humor already?  
  
A grin of pure childish delight that burst across Lal's face confirmed it. Guinan laughed in spite of the terrible joke.  
  
"You are tricky! Who taught you that joke?" She asked. Inside her heart was bursting with pride and wonder. Lal was a special, precious thing, but more than that she was clever and mouthy and fiercely curious. The Captain had told her what Lal had said to Admiral Haftel in their first meeting and Guinan had needed a few moments to recover from her triumphant laughter (she would not call it cackling as Jean-Luc had).  
  
"Commander Barclay told me the joke when he came to my father's lab. It made Barclay laugh and Geordi groan. Geordi didn't think it was funny but I told him it's because he doesn't appreciate situational humor," Lal explained. Guinan's eyebrows went up. She had a sneaking suspicion that a lot of pun and practical jokes were about to descend on the Enterprise.  
  
That is, if the Captain managed to win the case. Jean-Luc had expressed frustration over Starfleet demanding more confrontation regarding android autonomy. Guinan had gently rebuked him for forgetting his history, that many groups had had to fight long and hard for what was denied to them. But she'd also comforted him by saying Admiral Sato might not even need a trial to put Admiral Haftel in his place.  
  
"Well besides your legs, what else brought you here?" Guinan asked.  
  
"Would you like to come color with me?" Lal asked politely. Guinan smiled ruefully.  
  
"I would love to, Lal, but I'm working right now, so I can't leave the bar. Perhaps later today?" Guinan replied. Lal sat unmoving for a moment. Then her face crumpled.  
  
"Oh-Lal I will color with you! I want to! I just can't right now," Guinan explained hastily. But as she'd predicted, this had no effect on Lal; the young android now had synthetic tears pooling in her eyes.  
  
"Okay--Gui-nan. I just r-really wanted--wanted this, but logic-hic-ally you can't leave y-your post--why am I crying! I don't understand!" Lal managed to get out between hitched breaths and sobs. Now Guinan was really concerned. "Honey it's okay to cry when you're upset, but should I call your father?" She asked. Lal shook her head, and Guinan's mind immediately leaped to the only other person for the situation.  
  
"Should I call for Counselor Troi?" Lal hesitated a moment, then nodded.  


  
"I came as quickly as I could, Lal, what's going on?" Deanna arrived at the bar a few minutes later, looking flushed in the cheeks but graceful and composed as she always did. Lal could only shake her head, tears still leaking from her eyes.  
  
"She asked if I would color with her, and I said let's do it later because I'm working right now. It's not her reaction that's alarming me, it's her reaction to her _own_ reaction that concerned me," Guinan explained to the counselor. Deanna nodded in understanding.  
  
"Lal? Can you hear me?" The girl nodded. "I can sense you're feeling very conflicted, and disappointed. What are you disappointed about?" Deanna asked gently. Lal sniffed, seemed surprised that she needed to, and reached up to touch her nose. "I was talking to Wesley about anticipation, and looking forward to things, and I wanted to try it, so I really wanted to come here and color with Guinan, and I knew there was a possibility that she would not be able to, but when she declined, I still was disappointed! I don't understand Deanna!" The last exclamation was one of anguish. Deanna reflexively put a hand on the young woman's shoulder. Lal didn't shrug it off.  
  
"Lal, when it comes to emotions, logic often doesn't apply. You were very excited to come ask Guinan to color with you, so when this outcome wasn't fulfilled, you were upset. Knowing that it might not happen didn't lessen the disappointment," Deanna explained gently. Lal frowned.  
  
"I don't understand," Lal pouted.  
  
"What if we did the counting exercise you did with Geordi the other day? Would that help?" Deanna asked, throwing Guinan a look. She didn't have to ask what it meant, and immediately commed Data and Geordi as Deanna began to talk Lal through some kind of meditation exercise. Guinan put a few tissues on the bar, and watched Deanna work. She approved of Deanna's plan to instate Data and Geordi as Lal's official guardians; it was high time those two looked at the facts.  
  
"Lal, is this as bad as before? When your cascade almost happened?" Deanna asked gently when Lal had used the tissues and was much calmer. "It was...similar and different. Similar because I felt the emotion overcoming my net, using up my processing, but it was different because it was slower, more creeping. It is under control now," Lal nodded decisively. "I think I failed to see that time, in this situation, is not important. Whether Guinan and I color now or later, what is important is that we will do it together, and have _fun_ ," Lal said to Guinan.  
  
Geordi and Data chose that exact moment to burst into Ten-Forward, practically running for the bar. Guinan hid a smile behind her hand.  
  
"Lal, I got here as quick as I could, how're you doing? Did you-oh, Deanna, you're here, good," Geordi panted out. Deanna gently pushed him onto a stool. Data had been hot on Geordi's heels, and now loomed protectively over his daughter.  
  
"What emotion did you experience Lal," Data inquired. Guinan could honestly say she'd never seen Data look or sound so....soft. The android always reminded her of a slim band of steel; always bending, swaying with the currents, but never breaking, never changing shape. It seemed Lal inspired tenderness in him.  
  
"It's alright, Geordi, Lal and I did your exercise, she's functioning within normal parameters now," Deanna laughed a little. Geordi slumped on the bar.  
  
"Thank f-thank the stars," Geordi responded, just managing to stop his curse. Guinan glared at him for the near slip, but put a glass of water in front of the engineer. He gulped it down gratefully.  
  
Lal explained that she had been experimenting with anticipation, and that the results were 'far more fascinating than she'd anticipated'. Guinan snorted; Data frowned ever so slightly.  
  
"Lal, if I understand your observations correctly, you were disappointed that you could not color with Guinan immediately, but you were also disappointed that you were disappointed?" Data clarified. Lal nodded.  
  
"I did not anticipate what emotions might come after the anticipation, and I was disappointed that I had another negative emotion," Lal explained with a much larger frown than her father.  
  
"Lal, all of the emotions you have and will experience, they are a part of you. Do not reject them because they are not what you wanted to happen. Do you understand," Data instructed. Lal's frown became confusion.  
  
"But they are my emotions, it's my brain, can't I do whatever I wish with them?" Lal protested. Deanna put a hand on Data's shoulder, gently inserting herself into the conversation.  
  
"Lal, as you just witnessed, emotions can be very unpredictable and out of our control. That's part of the risk and pain of being able to feel. What your father is trying to tell you is that you shouldn't try to manipulate your emotions or be angry with yourself if something happens out of your control," Deanna explained. Lal looked dubious.  
  
"I suppose....the disappointment was entirely unexpected. I suppose, I should expect the unexpected?" Lal queried. Deanna beamed and nodded at her young patient.  
  
"Let's not forget being patience," Geordi crooked a smile from behind them. Lal smiled back. "I believe I will have to rely on Guinan for examples on patience," Lal said. Guinan couldn't stop herself; she burst out laughing at the looks of insult on Data and Geordi's faces.  
  
  
  
After, when Lal was situated at a table in Ten-Forward with her watercolor pencils and paper, Guinan a watchful presence from behind the bar, Data and Geordi walked slowly through the corridors, wrapped up in their own thoughts. Data was processing the results of his hasty tri-corder scan of Lal, but also replaying his conversation with Geordi from the previous day. He was reevaluating his conclusion, that how he perceived Lal's bouts was, in fact, having an impact. On him.  
  
"Geordi-"  
  
"Look, Data-"  
  
Both had spoken at the same time. Geordi laughed a little, signifying that he saw the situational humor. Data could have used his hearing to anticipate that Geordi was about to speak, but he always made it a point to not use his senses to anticipate his friends' and crew mates' actions, unless in an emergency. They seemed to find the ability unnerving and uncomfortable, much of the time. Data could understand that it was a left over instinct from millions of years of evolution; any being that can perfectly anticipate your actions is deemed a threat and a predator.  
  
"Go ahead, Data, what were you thinking about?" Geordi prompted him.  
  
"I wish to ask you forgiveness, Geordi, for my words yesterday. They were dismissive and short-sighted; I believe Lal's condition is having an impact on me," Data confessed. Geordi's pace slowed even more, and Data adjusted his own to match.  
  
"Oh, Data. That's...you don't have to ask for forgiveness. Sometimes, I guess, when the issue is about someone close to us, we don't always think logically. Or, it's easier to push thoughts away rather than acknowledge them. What kind of impact?" Geordi replied gently.  
  
"Part of my neural net is now constantly attuned to Lal; before it was satisfactory to know she was being cared for by the school, or safe playing in the holodeck. Now, with her emotional capability growing, I have my hearing tuned to her constantly, I ask the computer for updates on her status, I am constantly planning ways to get to her to prevent a cascade or implement your technique. I am not accustomed to this," Data said. Never before had he been so displeased at his limited ability to quantify his quasi-human behavior. He could only hope Geordi, his friend, peer, anchor, confidant, the person he trusted most in the entire universe would understand. Geordi stopped, lips parted slighty, and reached out and took Data's hand.  
  
Several things struck Data in those scant five seconds of time: the fascinating curve of Geordi's lips, the warmth emanating from his hands. Data catalogued these things and a hundred more, pleased that Geordi wanted to touch him and was not dismayed, like so many other beings, to be in contact with his synthetic skin.  
  
"Data, you're not alone. I am going to tell you the same thing I told Lal: you have _so many friends ___. We all care for you and for Lal, and we're not going anywhere. And neither are you! What just happened in Ten-Forward? That's what a safety net looks like. That's what friends do for one another. What I'm saying Data, is that it's okay to be worried about her, we all are. Hell, that's the hallmark of a parent! I don't know anything about kids, but I know a lot about parents and every single one I know does the exact same things you just described," Geordi told Data with a squeeze of his hand; another thousand pieces of information on Geordi La Forge, stored for safekeeping. Data opened his mouth to protest his friend's exaggeration, but Geordi cut him off.  
  
"Alright not the super hearing part, but you know what I mean," Geordi says faux-grumpily.  
  
"Geordi, I deeply appreciate you telling me and Lal both this. You mean a great deal to me as well," Data replied. He exerted the gentlest amount of pressure, to communicate sincerity and closeness. Geordi's face flushed, and Data detected an elevation in his heart rate. Data peered closely into his friend's face  
  
"Geordi what-"  
  
"There you are!" Counselor Troi exclaimed from down the corridor. Geordi jumped in surprise, and while Data was incapable of startling, he realized with some trepidation that he'd focused so closely on Geordi he had not anticipated the counselor's approach.  
  
"Deanna, what is it? What's wrong?" Geordi stammered. Data observed that Geordi's flush had not gone away, and he had his back against the corridor wall, .78 meters from where he'd stood three seconds before, and no longer holding Data's hand. Data examined this information and found it unacceptable. He had found the interaction highly enjoyable and beneficial to them both. But Geordi's reaction required further examination.  
  
"Counselor Troi, is there anything the matter?" Data inquired seriously, finally looking at her. Deanna beamed.  
  
"Not at all! I was just hoping to talk to both of you at the same time," she said happily. Data and Geordi looked at one another.  
  
"Okay, well, here we are, what's on your mind?" Geordi said, still slightly agitated, Data could tell.  
  
"No, not here, I wouldn't want the good news to spread too fast. Let's go to my office," Deanna said blithely. Geordi looked bewildered, but Data was curious. Deanna never made promises she did not intend to keep or exaggerated things, therefore whatever news she possessed was valid and ostensibly, positive.  
  
"Very good, Counselor, lead the way," Data said. She beamed, and practically floated down the hallway ahead of them. Geordi cleared his throat and followed her, and Data gently but insistently closed the .78 meter gap between them all the way to the counselor's office.  



End file.
